I say dear, stop police!

For YesBut’s Image on 24th May, Ozlady’s suggested the caption -

“We all knew the police were a bunch of skirts, but don’t u think this is taking it a bit far?”

London had suffered a spate of audacious jewellery thefts. The robberies were all performed by a gang following the same modus operandi. Breaking into exclusive jewellers in the middle of the day, they made their getaway by running into Ladies Toilets; the police being gentlemen were unable to follow them into the establishments.

To counter the robber’s tactic the Metropolitan Police Commissioner Sir Ian Blair formed a specialist squad made up of transvestites. The limitation of the squid became apparent when members wearing high heal shoes twisted their ankles when chasing the gang. They refused to wear flat healed shoes, saying “they had their image to think of”.

Sir Ian was forced to form a quick response support unit consisting of one woman on a mountain bicycle. To date the strategy has been successful, with a reduction in the number of robberies. Although there have been complaints from the general public that the special force were using too much makeup, and refusing to perform any duties that might risk them laddering their tights..

Fact, (honest its true), in 2006 a special Police squid was set up to patrol London’s Royal Parks: Hyde Park, Green Park and St James’s Park. They were provided with rollerblades to chase after petty thieves operating in the parks. The trial didn’t last very long - thieves found it easy to escape, they merely ran across the grass, the rollerblading police were unable to follow.