YesBut the smell! - Part 2

Continued from yesterday

For YesBut’s Image on the 9th June Helena suggested the caption

“Busker caught in sudden cold spell”.

The picture suggested the following story to me: -

A few tins missing could be accounted for by shoplifting, but half the stock missing was inexplicable. The manager demanded the stock-take should be repeated. As expected it showed the paint stock was correct. All might have been well, if Brian hadn’t entered the store just as the manager was being reinstated. Seeing Brian, he completely lost his head, he went berserk. Picking up the first thing close at hand he charged at Brian. Brian turned and ran, but not quickly enough the paint tin thrown at him caught him at the back of his head. On impact the lid sprang open and the contents oozed down over the still fleeing Brian.

Then fate took a nasty turn, had Brian kept on running down the street life would have been a lot simpler. But unfortunately he decided to hide in the back of a van. To make things worse, he chose a refrigerated van delivering frozen octopus testacies to a Chinese Medicine Store. He hid behind a stack of boxes, expecting to get out of the van at the next delivery point. Unfortunately for Brian, it was the last delivery of the day. When they found him in the morning he was frozen stiff.

He went home to wash himself and his cloths. When he tried to unbutton his coat, he realized he wasn’t covered with ordinary paint. In shock all the blood drained from his face, when he realised what he was covered in. The paint was from a batch specially developed for export to Greenland. It had been formulated to paint the ceilings of igloos. A special hardening agent had been added to accelerate drying when subjected to cold temperatures. He was covered in “Igloo Bright Sky Blue” paint. It was impervious to every type of solvent. However to prevent environmental contamination, the paint had been formulated so that when the igloo melted in the summer, the paint would decompose in sunlight.

Brian had no option but to sit in the sun until the paint’s molecules restructured. There was only one drawback with “Igloo Bright Sky Blue” paint, which while not being a problem to the inuits, made it unsuitable for general use. On decomposing it gave off the smell of rancid whale blubber oil. Hence the absence of people around poor Brian, and the man in the background asking his friend, “what the #@$& is that smell?”

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